An Undesirable Destination
by Kermit's Rainbow Connection
Summary: "Things to do, people to see. There's always more... Hello, it's me. Get him. Tell him, we're going out and it's all on me, except for the money and driving... I could go on all of Jack's stag parties in one night" (The Wedding of River Song) The Doctor decides to continue with his farewell tour before he dies, but will he survive the trip he's about to make?


**Okay… this is my first attempt at writing a Doctor Who fanfic. Actually, this is my first fanfic ever. In the Wedding of River Song the Doctor mentioned all the things he could do instead of dying so I couldn't help but overhear one that strikes me as hilarious and I wish there was a deleted scene of this. Instead, I put into writing. As with any fanfiction read and please review!**

"So Jack. This is what, your fifth stag party? Are you going to stop any time soon? Do you actually get married to any of them?" John, a random guest at the party asked curiously.

"Of course I do! You know, it's all in good fun. I just wish one certain person would come. Well, I wouldn't mind if he was the bride." Jack replied with a grin.

"I don't even want to know who the poor bloke is,' he cheered, 'a toast to Captain Jack! And to— wait what's his name this time?" The Captain whispered into his ear,

"Alonso."

"Alonso!" With that, the men clinked their jugs together and gulped the remainder of their drinks. To any other human, they wouldn't even consider the guests "men". Most of them were aliens he found in an intergalactic bar once. He knew he had them all at "drinks on me". Getting a little bashed was well worth the price of working overtime at Torchwood to pay off the bills. John was the only one who wasn't an alien, and he was from the fifty first century like him. Finally, the paper-made cake on a cart rolled into the room. One of the men called,

"So much for being faithful Jack!"

"When have ever I been that way!" he exclaimed. Everyone shouted "out" over and over again and surface was ripped open and a head poked out… but not the one anyone was expecting.

"Oh hello! Seems to be the right place, isn't it?" he muttered to himself. Jack smirked,

"Can I help you?"

"Oh. Oh! Jack, it's you! This is perfect. You see I tried this at Rory's stag party once but most of the people weren't that ecstatic about it. Well this is a different case scenario since I don't have to tell the groom that his fiancée kissed me. By the way I did not kiss Alonso. Am I rambling again?" Jack was not sure what to make of this man. Personality or appearance. His hair was dark and floppy, he wore a tweed jacket, his trousers were black and the color faded and not as definitive, and to top the getup all off a bowtie was snug around his neck. Jack could only respond,

"Yes." The man's face then wrinkled in almost utter bewilderment.

"Jack, you look like you don't even know me.' his perplexed expression soon faded, 'Oh! Now I understand. Jack, it's me. I regenerated." Jack's eyes lit up in recognition and just grinned a proper welcome. Now if he had thought this man was entertaining before, then he was certainly mistaken. Who else could it be besides the Doctor? It seemed that this regeneration wasn't familiar to everyday customs. Something he would try to use to his advantage. The people breathed to each other common questions like "Who is he?" and "What is _he _doing _here_?" A question Jack was amused to find the answer to.

"So Doc, didn't really expect it would be _you_ who would pop in to see _me_. Especially… not here." The Doctor suddenly became worried and queried,

"Oh do you not want me here? I certainly go if you want."

"No, of course not! Quite the opposite actually." His eyes trailed down this body and he now was really taking his appearance in now that he knew it was the Doctor. The wardrobe tended to always take a polar opposite angle every time.

"Oh, stop it!' The Doctor growled. He hadn't changed a bit. Finally, the Doctor swung his legs over the cart and climbed out of the cake.

'If you really want to know why I'm here, I've just been bouncing around a bit. Decided to try some new things, finish some old, and visit some people. Didn't really know what to get you for a gift.' the Doctor walked over and pulled out the sonic and his broken vortex manipulator. The whirring sound emanated from the tip for a few seconds and stopped.

'I'm really going to regret this." he grumbled.

"Oh Doc, I couldn't have asked more from you." Jack chirped.

"You know what, that was a bad idea. Stupid Doctor." The Doctor chastised himself and then proceeded to snatch the repaired device and impair it once more to its nonfunctioning state.

"Hey!"

"I'll make it up to you at the next one." he purposed.

"Wait. The next one? Who is it that time? Wait. More important question. I surprised you even went to this party. You're going to more?" Jack inquired.

"Oh ho ho ho. Kind of let that slip. Yeah, been trying to get them all done in one night. Just to get it over and done with."

"Oh I don't mind at all. I'm looking forward to them. Believe me."

"Jack, it's taking all my willpower not to give up this endeavor and just bolt to the TARDIS. So don't. Push it." Jack raised his hand and did a mock salute. The Doctor only sighed in response.

This whole time Jack hadn't even realized that the room had been entirely silent except the chattering of their two voices. They had all just had been staring the spectacle with shocked faces.

"Well it seems that I'm not really fitting in your crowd. I mean it's better than Rory's friends but still. I might be doing something wrong or maybe it's just everyone else's fault. Yep, definitely not me. You should invite better people to your parties. Anyways, see you again in a couple minutes for me but not for you. I think this time it's you and John, whoever that is. Well better be off. Tootle pip everyone!" With that, the one of the many strange encounters of this new Doctor to Jack ended as the Doctor ran and brushed past the guests to his TARDIS. Jack spun on his heels to face the now puzzled John standing before him. Jack knelt on one knee and asked one simple question that he asked many.

"Will you marry me?"

Now according to laws and structure of time that had now been established conveniently by the Doctor Jack knew he just couldn't refuse.

**I've always wanted to see Eleven and Jack interact with each other and this is what I've pictured in my head. Hopefully we'll see some of that in the 50****th**** anniversary! Also I just needed to write some goofy Eleven stories while I'm waiting for the Christmas special. If you haven't seen the trailer you should really check out it looks amazing and I hope it will lead up to its expectations. But I digress. I hope you all enjoyed this one-shot!**


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